I have always been the type of person to look hard into my actions.
If I fuck up, I never brushed it off lightly…. But ponder how did those actions come to be. Seek out my part in any “wrong” doing so I might keep from making the same mistakes again. I have changed my thought process drastically over the last 2 years.
Thru a serious of events in my life forced me to study what was manifesting itself in my life. There were too many things to be coincident so I explored their roots, and changed my thoughts because of it. Taking full responsibility for everything showing up in my life ( I always took responsibly but this was much more and and much deeper levels). I started to realize how much attention I gave to negative thought patterns and fear and such. (This aint one of those think happiness and everything will be hunky-dory). We do live in emotional bodies and there needs to be a place for that as well. With that said… I did set out to change my thought patterns and continuously re-focus my attention on things that give me “JUICE”. Usually my artwork, but I am currently seeking out other areas that also get my blood pumping.
Its all a process as we find out what we like and what we don’t like and continue to move ourselves to that which we enjoy. I wrote this as I am watching myself focus on the “failure” in “friendships” and possibly focusing too much as to let it pull me down some… But it is a process and I am re-centering myself and re-focusing myself, so to pick up and search forth. There are so many interesting, diverse and juicy things for us to see and explore. Allow for your / mine / our growth and keep moving towards those desires and notice every time your fear comes up and looks to stop you.